Bolton identifies , which he calls "roadblocks," that frequently sabotage relationships. These include judging, sending solutions (ordering, threatening), and avoiding the other person’s concerns (diverting). These behaviors damage relationships by increasing defensiveness or fostering dependency rather than connection. 2. The Three Clusters of Listening
Encouraging the speaker through "door openers" (e.g., "Tell me more"), minimal verbal encouragers, and attentive silence. People Skills: How to Assert Yourself, Listen t...
Communicating personal feelings and needs (e.g., "I feel frustrated when...") to reduce defensiveness in others. Bolton identifies , which he calls "roadblocks," that
In his influential handbook, , Robert Bolton presents communication as a learned set of skills rather than an innate talent. The text focuses on bridging the "interpersonal gap"—the emotional distance created by poor communication habits—through three primary pillars: reflective listening, assertive expression, and constructive conflict resolution. 1. Removing Communication Roadblocks In his influential handbook, , Robert Bolton presents
Use reflective listening to fully understand their viewpoint before stating your own.
Paraphrasing content, reflecting feelings, and summarizing meanings to ensure the speaker feels truly understood. 3. Mastering Assertiveness
Acknowledge their perspective from the start.